Protected: Time-out

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:


Good Girl


This song was been played when I was in a dark covered by green covers. My eyes stared on the floor while my back body been vulnerable and surrender to those people.

Anesth guy giving me the pain reliever on my back neck. My voice shout in silence, and tears came out of nowhere.

Those needle was bloody hurt my neck and the Mr. Surgeon start talking to his assistant, a lady, “Hey, let’s us start. Do you want me to put condom on your finger?”

“Haha. Very funny. And blablabla. Ok, Hidayah. We’re starting the operation.”

Of course, she informed me after he already started.

The song getting faded, and my eyes in tears. It was hurt. Smell something burned on my neck.

“Ada bau bakar lah..” I told them.

“Yea, sini takde ikan bakar. Tapi ada manusia bakar.” He’s joked. I was chuckled, and my left hand was just wanted to snapped his ball.

But, thanked to him too, his waist hold down my arm from doing anything & making me been a good girl.

In the middle of procedure, there’s a time I was really in pain and I cried like a baby, “Hurhur… Sakit.. Hurhur…” The anesth injected another reliever.. I laughed in pain again.

And they played Raya’s song. I was giggled when ‘Suasana Hari Raya’ came out.

“Weh, baru puasa sehari sudah mau raya ka?” one of them shouted,

And they laughed while my body was leaving to them to do some work…


Today’s at late afternoon, my body feeling cold hugged with blanket. Sometimes, feeling nauseous. Sometimes, feeling vulnerable..

The Rain

My friends never had a thought that I had interest in English drama & romance when I was a kid.

I was 11 years old I started watching the movie of ‘The Parent Trap 1998’. It was my first ever romance drama movie that I loved. Of course, in those days, I was so adored of Lindsay Lohan played as the twin..

But then, I was actually growing up affected or terngiang-ngiang by the romance scenes from their parents. There were many scene of raining in this movie. Especially, the one in London.

I was so adored with those moment (and also how the mom worked with her passion..) Walking in the rainy cold weather… Then.. Then, I was feel like in the raining moment, there’s always has hope..

Yarh, every time I walked in the rain & every time I looked outside from my window. I always terbayang2 scenes hujan di dalam cerita itu while thinking about my hope, and

So I end up to love rain..

Just now, I watched this movie again,

Then, I was almost cried at the scene when the guy said to his ex wife,

“You don’t have to be so brave.. Don’t you..?”

Somehow, the reason for that, it appeared in the last scene. Her face told him very well..

P.s:Β It just.. Sometimes, woman had to act brave when she has to..